Ep.2 Carrie Wilson: Designing a Life on Her Terms

I can't wait for y'all to meet the lovely Carrie Wilson! We Brené Brown some shit (can we just go ahead and make that a verb?!) and chat about Carrie's transition from the "safety" of corporate consulting for a big box retailer to making the leap to her own interior design firm.

We talk strategy, support, privilege, comparison, saying no, and everything in between! If you want to learn more about Carrie you can find all the ways to connect with her and full show notes here.

Resources:  Want to know 7 things you can do today to make leaving corporate easier?  Grab it here!

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Transcript

Carrie Wilson: 0:00

Like, that's it, this is it. I'm jumping. And then when people would say what's your option B? Or, you know, aren't you scared? Are you this? Are you that I'm like, No, I'm scared that I'm going to go back and be this person who I never wanted to be. Anyway.

Jamie Stephens: 0:17

Hey there and welcome back to breaking up with corporate. I'm Jamie, Renee, your host and truth telling gal pal here to have the real conversations with badass women doing their thing will talk candidly about the hard lessons impact business failure mindset, corporate BS and all the things. I'm excited to highlight and learn from these amazing women that have stepped into their power and are proving what's possible. Let's do this. I can't wait for you guys to hear this conversation with Carrie Wilson of Greenberg designs. It was so much fun. In her words, we Brene Brown some shit as we discussed her journey from years of consulting at a big box retailer to now going on six years as a commercial interior designer. We talk strategy support privilege comparison saying no and everything in between. Let's get to the show. Okay, awesome. Well, thank you so much for joining me today. I'm excited to have you here.

Carrie Wilson: 1:18

Thank you, Miss Jamie. It's gonna be a pleasure. We're gonna Brene Brown some shit today. So this should be good.

Jamie Stephens: 1:25

I'm ready. I'm ready. Let's do this. Yeah. So if you want to start if you just want to tell people a little bit about who you are, and kind of what you're doing right now, and then we'll kind of get into your backstory here in just a little bit.

Carrie Wilson: 1:40

Absolutely. My name is Carrie Wilson. And I own a commercial interior design firm, called Greenberg design. And we are on our six year.

Jamie Stephens: 1:50

That's awesome. So you're over the five year hump.

Carrie Wilson: 1:54

That's what they say. But I'm like, I think there's always humps in all that well. But they said, if you can make it five to seven years, and I'm like, yeah, we can do this. Let's do it.

Jamie Stephens: 2:05

That's awesome. Okay, and so what were you doing before you started your own firm?

Carrie Wilson: 2:11

So before we started Greenbird, um, I was actually a consultant for a big box retailer. So basically, my job consisted of client retention, helping them on their exterior brand efforts in the architectural portion of things. I did everything from entitlement work, all the way through construction administration. So if you're familiar at all with construction, and so there's really no no

Jamie Stephens: 2:45

entitlement. I'm thinking like teenage daughters here. So

Carrie Wilson: 2:50

anytime, anytime I'm available. So basically, I could take the project from the very beginning to the very end and get everything completed on the project. And so I actually moved down here with my husband, we both worked for the same firm. And so it worked out beautifully. And I had the pleasure of working with some great folks. And quite honestly, what happened was I was basically plateaued out, I felt like I was on this high end doing great. Everything was going wonderful. But something just wasn't sitting right in my gut. And I was about ready to turn 40. And it was almost just like it. This is the moment. Yeah, what's going to happen? How are we going to do this? And that's really how this all started how Greenbird started.

Jamie Stephens: 3:45

Awesome. So whenever you say you move down here, where did you move from?

Carrie Wilson: 3:49

Kansas City? Oh, okay. Okay, got born and raised born. So

Jamie Stephens: 3:53

how did you recognize that you had plateaued? You just like weren't really feeling satisfied anymore? Or like, what were some of the signs that kind of kept showing up?

Carrie Wilson: 4:04

This is a great question. So honestly, I'm really big into like my gut feelings, and just trying to stay in tune with my buddy. And what I think is happening. And it really came down to gut feelings. And then also some of it was I knew that I wasn't going to advance any further into the firm that I was currently with. And they were great very upfront with me saying you need to do XY and Z to make these things happen. And I was like, I don't want those things. That's not what I want out of this. And so when they clearly defined for you to advance your career, you need to do these things. I was like, and I'm out. Bouncing. Deuces, so and that's exactly what I did. And they were wonderful. I mean, they were great to work with and but there was still just something missing. For sure. Yeah.

Jamie Stephens: 5:01

So is it. You said you keep saying we is it? Do you have a partner? Is that you and your spouse or how

Carrie Wilson: 5:07

actually it's just myself? Okay. I do collectively the team. Yes, God. Yes. Okay. Absolutely. Because full transparency, if somebody can do this alone by themselves, yeah, you are a complete badass. I just know. For me, it's a village. There's a lot in here. Yeah. I was like, there's a lot of strong women behind us. And it means you. And I think, you know, I have a great supporting husband who helped me on this journey. And we can talk a little bit about that, too, if you want to. But um, yeah, this, this has not been just a single thing, a single path for me. Or just one person? It has definitely been? Yes. And it has been a collaborative with a group of very, very wise women, for sure.

Jamie Stephens: 6:00

So how has your version of success like evolved over the last six years? Like, what were you looking whenever for whenever you first went out? And then has that changed? Or is it still I mean, I'm assuming it's changed. But I mean, six years is a lot of growth.

Carrie Wilson: 6:21

Yes, corporate mindset. It's, I hate to be so black and white about this, but it truly was, I mean, corporate was if I'm not making this X amount of money, then I'm not succeeding. Or if I don't have this title, I'm not succeeding and what I'm doing I mean, I need these things. And then having your own business and starting it, you're like, Oh, hi, survive another year. There's yay,

Jamie Stephens: 6:46

success. I didn't screw up this Facebook Live I did or what you know, whatever it is that like, we're constantly testing ourselves. But you know, that's something interesting, just really looking at that version of success for the people like that still are in corporate. I mean, it's really whenever you really stop and you look at your your bosses, or you look over your boss's boss's and you're like, wait a second, I'm like, so focused on climbing this damn ladder, but the ladder?

Carrie Wilson: 7:17

Exactly. And I know a lot of people are like, oh, yeah, it's not about the money. Yeah, hi, I have to eat and live in. I need water. Um, so yeah, I needed to make, I could make some money on this and still have a passion for it. But yes, when you really sit down and start to focus in and hone in on, this is what I see my life being and how do I get there? How do I get to point A to point B, it's completely different. And I think that's the hardest part is really sitting down and getting it all out there. Because there's a whole lot of shit that you're going through emotion wise, right. And it's, it's really hard just to lay it all out there. I mean, as far as putting it down on a piece of paper, I mean, there's a lot of bumps and bruises and scars and all these things that you have to work through, to really sit there and think this is really what I want to do and become and I know, we've actually talked about that a little bit before, even with your journey. And what you had done as well. Did you have that same feeling as well?

Jamie Stephens: 8:27

It's, it's been continual. I mean, as far as you know, I didn't always want to corporate was never my go to place. It's just kind of where I ended up. And I'm the type of person that's like, Okay, well, if you put me in charge of something, like, I'm like, I'm your girl, you know? I'll succeed at it. It's just, sometimes I have to back up and be like, Wait, what am I doing? I'm like, succeeding for the sake of succeeding. Versus like, what do I really want out of this? Like, yeah, I'm killing it at work. But that's not where my passion is. So really, being honest with myself, I think is probably where it started about, like, I'm not happy and and then really letting go of kind of that identity that you have with your corporate job or like that. You know, it's on one hand, it's confining, because you're like, This is my title, and this is what I do. And you have your I had my worth tied up in all of that, which is not a very healthy place to be when you're not growing at the rate you would expect because I'm like, wait, I'm doing these things like what's happening, but I'm just kind of off on a tangent now, but I don't even it's like wait Yeah, like, what are we even talking about? No, but it's really just sitting with that and just being like, what? What do I want? What is going to make me happy? Because I look in at the examples in front of me. And this, I can tell you, if this is what it looks like, in 10 years, if I'm here like us,

Carrie Wilson: 10:20

like, I don't want actly. Exactly. I don't care what the money is. Yes, yes. It's that moment when you sit there and you think, Oh, my gosh, could I honestly do this? Honestly, in my heart of hearts, can I do this for another 20 years? Yeah. And I think that's a lot of it. But I don't know about you, Jamie. But I truly felt like this that like going through that exercise of figuring out this is what I wanted to do. And how do I do it? I really felt like that was the hardest part is just jumping, just jumping. And then anger sets. You know, this is not the first like you were like diving in shallow water. And it's okay. I mean, and I guess for me, I thought through all of this, the most humbling experience was writing down on that piece of paper. This is what I want to do. And this is why, and then really figuring it out. Because it's really not for me, like I said, Yeah, I know, like we all need to eat, it wasn't necessarily about making the corporate figure, because when I really tore it down, I mean, the corporate money was great, don't get me wrong, but I was missing out on so much, and I was so unhappy.

Jamie Stephens: 11:43

It's like, it's a trade off just isn't there always, you know, when it's just like, if I'm going to perform at this level, I think you just get to the point to where you can count on yourself more, you know, it's more like, I it may not, it may look very messy. But eventually, if I keep pouring into myself, like I keep pouring into other companies that aren't fulfilling me. Like, you'll get there, you know, and everything will add up. And is there a place that you had to get like, did you know what you wanted to do? Like, was it design? Or was that just like, the

Carrie Wilson: 12:23

so much actually, yeah, I actually, I went to college, and got an interior design degree, and I am a licensed interior designer. Gotcha. And so when I started with the previous company, you know, it was just they, I'm, you know, I'm giving out my age here. 25 years ago, there were no need for commercial interior designer, it was more of an all inclusive type, type of package and things from where I started. And so I just thought, well, I need a job, right? That's kind of like where we all go, I need a job. And I'm going to take this, and it's going to be a great experience, and that I'm going to build off of that, you know, in building that career and that stepping stone and thinking like, Oh, yes, yes, yes, I'm only going to be here for a certain amount. And I, myself am fiercely loyal, which can get me in trouble at times. A lot of that came from, I felt, Oh, I don't want to let my mentors down, or it was doing everything for everyone. But for me, like, I never put myself in that equation. It was always like, Well, my mentor will be upset if I leave or I can't leave my team behind or what how's that project and get out the door? It was never What does Kerry want? Right? And when I actually sat down again, and started thinking about it, it was just that light bulb moment. Like, I'm not doing anything that I want. This is not how I even envisioned my career path beam.

Jamie Stephens: 13:53

Do you think that just gets trained out of us like through school through growing up? Or is it just I'm just wondering if I know, we've had different experiences as far as like you said that you have your your brothers in a male dominated household and my mind is not so I'm just wondering, like, does what you know, because at some point, you're like, for women, I feel like especially you're always doing for other people. Like I'm just now I mean, I've got I'll be 42 in December, and it's like, I'm just now to the point where I'm like, No, this is me time like that, like, I am a human being. And I get to do things all by myself. You know, I mean, but it's just like, but I've always been such a caretaker from like, or a caretaker of other people's feelings almost. And I put that on myself. I'm just wondering at what point like, do you did you ever feel that like, it sounds like whenever you're like, I don't want to leave my team. I don't want to leave my mentor or disappoint them. You How do you think that it? Like, is that something you learned in school or at home? Or like, I'm just kind of curious what your thoughts are on that? Yeah.

Carrie Wilson: 15:09

So for me, I know that we've discussed this previously. But yeah, I mean, as much as I come from a background of badass women, I come from a background of badass men. As I told you before, Jamie, my husband is probably more of a feminist than I am. Which is incredible. Yeah. Which is one of the things that I love about him. Yeah, he's incredible and so supportive and okay, like, how do we do this? How do you how do we need to make this happen for you tell me how I can do this and help it but my brothers, you know, anytime that I was like, Hey, I think I'm going to start a whole bit my own business, it was just kind of like, Yeah, do it. But I come from a long line of entrepreneurs. My dad was an entrepreneur, both my grandfather's were entrepreneurs. My brother's, you know, we're entrepreneurs. And so, maybe just seeing that, and knowing like, I can do this, why can't I? Um, but to your point? Probably so, probably. So in probably in some subconscious type of nature. We are so much more. And I'm stereotyping here. So it's fine. Yeah. Like, I was like, I'm getting stereotyping. In a sense. I think women generally tend to be more in tune to things. And so maybe that is some of it. Um, you know, that's, that's a great question to, like, sit there and think about because in my head, um, I never felt like I couldn't, it really came down for me. I was so loyal to that company. And I didn't want I just, I didn't want to basically say, I'm leaving. And when they asked me why, and I'm like, for me, you know? And maybe that was, maybe that was some of it. And, you know, again, that caregiver attitude. I mean, as you know, before I even started Greenberg. And I worked for a nonprofit for like, eight months. Yeah, right. Yeah. That that did not work for me. There's not Yeah, I got to get things done. Like things need to happen. And I had that mentality. And that came from corporate Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, go. Go. Go.

Jamie Stephens: 17:35

Yeah. And what was it about the the nonprofit that you couldn't? With? Just like the bureaucracy of it, or?

Carrie Wilson: 17:41

Yes, yeah, definitely. Definitely. That and how do I say this? It was just so overwhelming at times. Just absolutely. Because in corporate for me, there was no emotions involved in it. But when it came to the nonprofit, I was fiercely I would say I was fiercely and emotionally tied to that nonprofit. And it in it still does mean the world to me. I was a volunteer there for eight years before I I went in applied for a job there. Because I was, it was just time for me to do something right with my life. I could, you know, go out and change the world. And I'm like, yeah, no, I'm gonna go change the world my way by starting my own business.

Jamie Stephens: 18:43

Well, yeah, I mean, I think there, I obviously think that different people are led to different things. And that is right up somebody's alley, but like, I totally get, I totally get your vibe. I feel like we're on the same, the same vibe there. But yeah, I am. It's interesting, just the way it all kind of shakes out, I think that it's just as important for women to be making money, so that they can be supporting those causes, if they're not led to actually be working in them. But you know, like, I feel like the more money that we can get into the hands of more women, and you know, just because of that nurturing, again, we're stereotyping. There's men out there that are nurturing as well, but I'm just ready to see the other side of the coin. It just seems like, you know, the 50% of men or whatever, it's been highlighted for so long that it's like there's so many untold untapped stories out here that I really just want to highlight. So that's really,

Carrie Wilson: 19:49

I completely understanding and agree. I was just, I was so lucky. And I mean, you know when we talked a little bit previously. Jamie, before there were a couple things like that really stuck in my mind after we were talking a little bit. And the first one was that I have always been around men who empower me. Yeah, which I think that's quite fascinating. And women, I can't, I can't think of a woman in my family, who is not a complete badass in their own way. Like, they are so powerful. And then can just come in, and just do it. And they, and you can feel that power from them. So that was one. And I think the other one was just the privilege of being able to do this, to be able to say, you know, okay, I'm, I'm going to start my own business, and I just work nonprofit for like, $4 an hour. When you break down, yeah, hours you work, and then the bottles of wine. And you're like, Yeah, I made like, $2.50 an hour

Jamie Stephens: 21:01

doing this. So

Carrie Wilson: 21:04

yeah, it's rock star here. Um, and so, you know, I started thinking about it. And I was just like, this is, this is such a privilege, how I had all this support behind me, you know, very few people came up to me and said, Oh, really, I'm gonna start your own business. So what's your option B? And I was like, No, there's no option B, I'm killing this, I'm going to do it. And I don't even want to think about an option B. So that and then, you know, putting together the plan the strategy with my husband, and sitting down with him and saying, Alright, I know, I've got about a year left in me in corporate. Um, and then I'm not going to survive, like Heather probably roll might be a small postal event or something, you know, going on, this is gonna be really bad. So how can we how can I do this, and again, a privilege 100% Pure privilege, we just started stockpiling money. And it was basically like, alright, so if you start your own business, how much do you think you're going to make your first year? And we lived off of that, like, we and then we put everything else back? Yes. Privilege. 100%? And, um, I'm not sure. I'm not sure if a lot of people talk about that when they start about. I'm just jumping, you know, in starting their business, and I'm so absorbed tonight, and I think that's so important to talk about is just knowing that, hey, you got set up, right?

Jamie Stephens: 22:49

Yeah. I mean, you can't even talk about doing anything. And if you're not, your basic needs, are not even being met, you're like, how am I even. There's just so much, you know, like, you do, uh, hear the occasional story of someone being in a homeless shelter, and then like, finding their way out in court, you know, but that is, like, so rare. I just, I feel like the privilege, you know, I've thought a lot about this, because I'm just, I don't have the, I guess I'm just talking about this, but I don't have the best relationship with my mom. And like, some of the things, it's just like, I know, because I've spent so much time working on myself, how much she would benefit from her own journey with like, healing herself and all of that. And I think about that, and it's like, I try to come at it from a very compassionate place of like, you know, whenever you're just in survival mode, like, what, and we can debate, you know, part of that is self made part of, you know, it's like, there's a whole other sure ball of wax there, but just Blake, like, basically speaking. If you're always in survival mode, for whatever reason, real or self made, then, like you, it's hard to even consider, like, what anything else looks like or what it could be or having that example. So I mean, really acknowledging like, I appreciate that you acknowledge that place of privilege because it is important and something that, you know, people shouldn't feel bad if they're not there. You know, it's like,

Carrie Wilson: 24:42

yes, absolutely. Absolutely. I appreciate you just your openness and your honesty about that. That's so important because, honestly, Genie just hit a light bulb moment. For me, um, yeah, you get into survival mode. And as I mentioned before, Um, my dad and my brothers, there was no mention of a mom because my mom password was very, very young. And I did have a stepmother. Um, but it was always the three fellows, you know. And so when you get in that survival mode, I mean, that's all you can think about. There's, there's, it's almost feels like, as long as my head is just like right above the water, I'm still breathing that that's okay. I'm surviving in my fear going like crazy. My hands are going, it doesn't matter. I'm still breathing. And I'm still here, because you've been through worse. And you know what the worst looks like? So you don't even think about kind of digging deep. And that's, that's just like what we were talking about, you know, earlier is you just get stuck. You just get stuck in. So how do you get out of that? And then that's that to me again? That was the hardest part. Yeah. Yeah.

Jamie Stephens: 26:05

I think you just, you know, like, for me, like, what I'm doing is I mean, I haven't even figured out how I'm going to make money yet. I mean, just being completely blunt. Yes. But it's almost like, because I feel so right about what I'm doing. Yeah, because I have that privilege of not having to figure that out. Right. This very second. Right, then, you know, I feel like it's one of those things that's just lining up to, to come. And I don't know, like, where I was going with that. But I mean, it just seems like the hardest part, after like, post survival, like you got that survival thing down. Corporate, what is going to make me happy? Like, what is that thing? Because for me, it's like, well, I don't want to do what I've been, like, supply chain? No, thank you, you know, what is that thing and it's a totally different avenue. And so there's that comes with all its own set of challenges and everything. I mean, that like, it's fine. I enjoy learning, which is totally something you have to be open to, I think, right. Right. You wear a lot of hats.

Carrie Wilson: 27:24

Agreed. And in to your point, I think it's exactly that is like it's easy. And I say this with the the kindest words because I was there. It's easy to go in work that 6am To we all know corporate whenever you get off work job, compared to and I know a lot of people disagree with me on this until you try it. You sit down and you write down on a piece of paper. This is what I want out of my life. This is what I want out of my my job. I mean, that's why most people stay is because it's really sitting down and digging deep. It's raw, it's dirty. It's nasty. All these emotions come up. And you're just digging, digging. And then finally you're like, Yeah, okay, this is this is it. This is where I needed to be.

Jamie Stephens: 28:16

It's so hard to get there. I mean, it's not it's well. I don't know if hard is the right word. It's it's exhausting.

Carrie Wilson: 28:26

I think the journey. It's a journey.

Jamie Stephens: 28:29

Yeah, all of the layers and all of the stuff. And yes, just honest, you have to be with yourself in order to even get to those places. So I agree.

Carrie Wilson: 28:42

I agree. And then once you get there, you feel almost, I felt unstoppable. Like that's it. This is it. I'm jumping. And then when people would say what's your option B? Or, you know, aren't you scared? Are you this? Are you that I'm like, No, I'm scared that I'm going to go back and be this person who I never wanted to be ever anyway. That's, that's scary. That is scary stuff right there. But if I come over here, and work as hard as I work for these other people over here, um, there's not a reason why I can't succeed. Exactly. I mean, and when you really put it in your head and you sit there and you think, like, why can't I do this? It really comes down to having confidence in yourself, and just going after it and getting it. You know, I hate to use the word, hustle. I you know, it's like a hustle. Well, hustle means a lot of things to different people. I really think it kind of comes down to just like confidence, and knowing like, I'm unstoppable. I can do this. Like, let's rock and roll. We've got this.

Jamie Stephens: 29:50

How did you get to that point? Was there I mean, was it a journey or you felt supported growing up and so it wasn't as hard

Carrie Wilson: 29:58

or I think it was a journey. That's

Jamie Stephens: 30:01

those aren't mutually exclusive. This or That. That's what you get.

Carrie Wilson: 30:08

How black and white? Do we want to go here? No, it's good. So basically, it was a combination. And, you know, this is one of the things that my husband like, he laughs a little bit about this, but like, I can roll out a bed, and I'm like, I'm doing this. And he was like, what, what's happening here? Like, what's going on? And it really was like, it was just kind of, like, yeah, I've like done all this research. And I know, this is like, what I'm going to do. So back to your question, which is, how did you know, it was a journey? And it was a little bit of that journey. And then I think when I got on that path, and then I just was like, This is it. This is what I'm doing gameplan game on, and how am I going to now make this happen. And it was a lot of just putting together strategy. And I obviously just couldn't quit my job, and that wasn't gonna work out. So again, stockpiling as much as we possibly could seeing if we could even do it. My husband and I are very frugal people, we do not drive the best of the best or live in the, you know, the best of the best. We love goodwill, we're very frugal people. And we do all of those types of things. And that's what also enabled me to get here. Um, you know, and a lot of people do it differently. I mean, you can go out, you can get grant money, you can go out and find somebody who's going to help support you financially on this journey for you. And everybody has a different path of travel. But for me, it was truly strategy and just trying to figure out like, how are all these pieces of the puzzle going to come together?

Jamie Stephens: 31:55

Yeah. So what has been your biggest, like, mindset challenge? As a business owner, like, once you've made that commitment to like, Okay, I'm doing my own thing. Like, what would you say, in the past six years has been like the biggest kind of lesson you've had to learn?

Carrie Wilson: 32:16

How much time do we have? I'm like, Oh, my goodness, I think the one that I will continually struggle with. And this is why you need your people, your your group of people to support you. I compare myself to others constantly. And Comparison is the thief of joy. Yes, and that's a dolly ism for you, girl. Right there. That's my girl. Um, but sitting down, and just, you know, seeing what other people are doing. And then you start, how did he do that? Why am I not this successful? What is going on here? No, back it up, back it up. Because they're on their own journey and their own plan. And you need to like, stick to yours, and do what feels right for you in your journey. So I definitely think that's a big one. And then I would say probably my second one is, it's okay to say no.

Jamie Stephens: 33:25

Yeah, that's, too.

Carrie Wilson: 33:29

Yeah, and these are all things. And the reason why they're sticking out so quickly is like, I'm still working on these things, is still just a work in progress. Because this is something that I know, being a perfectionist, I'm going to battle this for quite some time. And that's okay. It just takes practice and patience. And but I know I can do it. And I mean, it's been six years, I can do this.

Jamie Stephens: 33:59

So you can do hard things. I can do hard things. And so hi, I, um, I struggle with perfectionism too. And the whole comparison thing, and one of the things I've learned with comparison, I don't struggle with that as much anymore. Mainly because it's never we never get the full picture like we just don't you know? And you can fool yourself to believe that they've had it easy or they've done XYZ and it's you just have no idea just like anybody that knows me or knows you personally has no idea the steps that have led up to this moment. Our own personal like my family get like out here, you know, I mean, it's just like, what goes on inside and the work that you do and, but if you can compare yourself to where you were yesterday, you know, like, oh, yeah, comparison is with you. And that keeps you focused on your own journey. And it's like you still have, you can still kind of hack with that competitive nature. You know, where is it? Did I grow? Versus yesterday? Did I do something to move forward? Or you know, and I found that that's a very, that's a that's a plate that's a happy place for my brain between comparison and paralysis.

Carrie Wilson: 35:26

Absolutely. I love that. That's genius. I'm gonna have to steal that one, Jamie, because I think being a perfectionist, compare, compare, compare. Well, CES, just take it all back five years, and where were you compare yourself to five years ago? Right? And when you need to, like cut it up a little bit? Okay, where were you at two months ago. I love that I that's, that's quite lovely. And definitely a tool I need to write down for sure.

Jamie Stephens: 35:52

It feels more empowering. Because you know, what led up to that point, and you know, what, the progress that you've made, and just being able to celebrate that, like, celebrate our little progress? And I feel like that part has been a game changer for me. What was oh, saying? No, was the other one a

Carrie Wilson: 36:15

no, yes. Um, I think I have always heard, when you start out, you just take what you can get. And then I started figuring out, okay, I'm taking all these projects, because that's what I can get. But are they really building my business the way I want it to be built in the sense of, I took this project, and it took so much energy out of me, in so much effort, I actually could have been building that relationship with X, Y, and Z. And, you know, working that way. Now, that's just how I think I'm sure a lot of people are like, No, you just take what you get, and then you just do it. That the creative field for me? No, I'm just like, Yeah, I just, you know, I'm, I'll figure it out some other way. That is, again, that's an option B, and I don't do option B.

Jamie Stephens: 37:10

Yeah. No, I, I, I feel that just because I've heard to just like, if it's not a Hell, yes. Then it's a hell no, you know, because that way, it just makes it very clear. And it's like, do I want to work on this project? Yeah, that would be exciting. is like, yeah, you know, which is like your, your energy's not there, which means everything that you do is going to be harder. Like, you might as well just honor where you're at, let it be easy for other people and just be like, No, Mm hmm. Also coming with that, though, is that women think? Or maybe just people in general, you know, me going back to my women soapbox, but I feel like whenever people say, no, they think they have to follow it up with a why, like, we believe that we have to justify a saying no. And we just don't agree. Period, end of story. Like you don't know, anything, period.

Carrie Wilson: 38:25

Period. That's it? Yes. Generally, it's no, but I do have a few people that you could call off the goes.

Jamie Stephens: 38:36

You can be like civil and respectful and all of those things and professional but like, you don't have to say, oh, it's really busy. And my daughter's got this thing coming up. And I've got to do this. And I'm planning for vacation. I really don't think that it's like, who cares? Wow. Like just know, right?

Carrie Wilson: 38:53

Absolutely. And that's exactly what they're thinking. I don't really care. I just need to know if you're going to work on this or not.

Jamie Stephens: 39:00

Can I move on? Or like, exactly.

Carrie Wilson: 39:03

So this is a no. Yes, no. Period. Like that. I mean, if you're ballsy enough to jump and start your own business. Why do you not trust yourself in making decisions? Yeah.

Jamie Stephens: 39:17

So you're like, Come on, just,

Carrie Wilson: 39:22

yeah, I'm like, Just do this. This is this is that confidence thing? Right is just coming back and saying like, okay, trust me. I mean, I'm sure this is your first year.

Jamie Stephens: 39:34

Yes, this is my first month.

Carrie Wilson: 39:39

Congratulations, you've made it through a month. That's even a big girl break up the champagne. So this is a good thing. And I think sometimes we can get lost in our own thoughts quickly. Um, and it's just really going back to that strategy in that plan of Like, this is what I want. This is how I'm going to get there. And I don't want to say business plan because No, I can't say I really wrote a business plan. I know all the business people are like cringing right now, like, no business plan. But I mean, I'm a creative person, I doodled and did what I thought I needed to do. But I think that's that's a lot of it is just, again, like setting down and just believing in yourself and having that confidence that you can do it. And let me tell you, there are still days that I think in my head, holy shit. What did I do? What happened? Like why? Why am I stressed out? Yes, you will be stressed out. Yeah, doing all these things? Because you're an accountant, your marketing your business development? Oh, NPs by the way, then you need to do your job. Yes, exactly. And so you get all these things going. And then you're just like, why didn't I just work? The 8am to 7pm shift for corporate? Like, what why am I doing this? And then it's just a bad day. It's just a bad day. It's not a bad year or a bad month? It's just a bad day. Yeah. And in you have those anywhere and everywhere you go. So. So I'm impressed that you're holding on for a month. Yeah. You're doing great.

Jamie Stephens: 41:27

Well, I think it's no, I'm really loving, like part of myself. I'm just like, pinch me, like, this is what I get to do now. Like, just talk with women and highlight what they're doing and how awesome they are. And it just feels like all the conversations I want to be having. So it I know to expect kind of that dip, and I'm prepared for it. So it's just like, you know, I feel like, well, here's the thing. It's just not my first time I left corporate in 2018. Yes, but I had a plan B. And guess what I chose, after nine months, when it got hard, I did my plan B and like, I think this time. And and the long story of it is are a lot like short story. But it's basically it's just my mindset was not where I needed to be, I left a toxic situation. And I like I didn't know what I didn't know. And I didn't, I wasn't prepared for how shitty I felt like, because I loved the people and I loved the like that I worked with specifically, it was just like, all of the other stuff, you know, all like, absolutely the corporate crap. And so it was like to wake up the next day after I left. And it was just like coming because I had a team and there was like, I was always in needed. And I was you know, all of these things. And then to go from that to just nothing the very next day. I'm like, what, like, I it was my purpose. Like, I felt like I didn't have a purpose. And so yeah, for a long time, it was just like, that's when my whole mindset stuff like growth, personal growth started happening, because I'm like, sitting with myself going gross. Like what is happening here? Like, Oh, yes. Sheila mean, girl in my head is just going off on me all the time, you know, so? Yeah, so this time I feel a lot even though I don't have this specifics, worked out. You know, I feel the main part, which is my mindset, my confidence, like, all of that is in check. And I just like my energy is there. And so like the Restall just, I mean, I think that's the difference between having being a creative and having a business plan. You know,

Carrie Wilson: 44:07

I was like, Yeah, I didn't know business.

Jamie Stephens: 44:10

My energy is aligned with my goals, you know, energy. It's a totally different mindset. My husband's like, Well, what about your pro forma, and you got to do this, and where's the money gonna come from? And I'm like, we'll figure it out.

Carrie Wilson: 44:25

Just come to me, don't worry about it. I got

Jamie Stephens: 44:28

saved up, you know, I mean, so it's just like, just having that space in that freedom. With the positive mindset, I just feel like, okay, look out. Yeah, you know, that's what I want to bring is just, I'm here for this and all of these conversations.

Carrie Wilson: 44:47

I love it. And I'm sure that as each person that you're speaking with, I'm sure everybody has a different journey. Not one journey is the same. And so I think this is why this is so incredible, and that you're doing this is that when you listen to other people's stories, you can all of a sudden be like, Oh, Jamie and Carrie, they're creative people. So I don't necessarily have to create a business plan. But I do need a little bit of strategy in there. Because I think a lot of people are like, well, to create a business, you have to go do this and do that. And you're like, No, no,

Jamie Stephens: 45:24

I did chores for some people. Yeah, it

Carrie Wilson: 45:27

didn't work for me that way. Um, so I think it's, that's why it's so great that you're having this range of people that come on here. And when you share those experiences, you're awesome. Audience can come back in and say, Okay, this resonates with me, I get this. This is, this is like a person that would be in in my circle, I understand this person, do you have a circle? Do you have a network of people that you kind of call and chat and talk to you, as well? Like, just business? Or ideas? Or why the hell you do this to me? Um,

Jamie Stephens: 46:05

I have a couple of Facebook groups. Okay, business related that I'm involved in. As far as like, it's kind of a lonely journey, sometimes to where you're just I wouldn't say that my, like, my friends, they don't really understand what I'm doing. You know, I mean, it's like, they understand like, yeah, she's starting a podcast, but it's like, they don't understand, like, the various ways to get paid or the, you know, like all of the very, like, they haven't been submerged in this world, like I have for the last couple of years. And so for people that are in my normal network, they just don't get it. And that's okay.

Carrie Wilson: 46:48

Agreed. And that's okay. I would like to say that that Jamie, for me was something that definitely has helped me, I have a handful of, they're all women, they just happen to be entrepreneurs. And that each one of them, I can go to them for different insights in views. For instance, my best friend is an entrepreneur as well. And so a lot of times, she has a degree in marketing. And so I'll call her and I'll say, hey, is this cheesy as hell? Or like, like, No, this is good. You know, sometimes you just need somebody else saying, like, you really should think about it this way, and binding them with people. And it's, it's just, it's incredible. And it's just building like that circle, again, that you can call in, you can trust, and then you don't feel so alone. Because sometimes you do feel like you're on an island. You're like, nobody gets it. You know, people think I'm just sitting in my office all day, like, we're gonna do a podcast, right? Like, no, you don't get it. Like, it's so much more than this. And then when they're like, well describe it to me, or like, I don't know, it's so overwhelming. I can't even describe it. Yeah. So you're like,

Jamie Stephens: 48:05

Well, I'm doing all of these things that seem unrelated. But I promise they're all connected.

Carrie Wilson: 48:12

Together, I promise me incredible. Just trust me. But having that circle in that group, and I mean, genuinely, like true, honest women who have got your back. And it's one of the most powerful things ever. And it's just, I can't give it enough. Because like I said, if I have a hiccup with anything, or just like, just need, hey, this person wants something from me. Should I give it to them? No. Why would you give them that? I don't know. Because they know don't do that. And you're like, Yeah, right. Again, no period. Done. Yeah.

Jamie Stephens: 48:51

Sometimes you just feel like, you know, it's like, there's things that are available to where it's like, yeah, I can go and I can get a coaching thing. Or like, I can get a coach I can talk to but sometimes you just want to pick up the phone with somebody that you know, and trust and just be like, hey, like, what am I missing? Like? Yes, yes. No, I don't have that yet. So I am

Carrie Wilson: 49:16

calling me girl call me to.

Jamie Stephens: 49:20

I said, Yeah, look, we're there.

Carrie Wilson: 49:24

As I call me, because this is good. And it's so important to have, especially when they're not in your profession, and you're like, I'm gonna do this. What do you think? No, I don't even understand what you're doing right now. You're speaking a different language to me or something of that sort. So. Yeah, yeah. I think this is great. This is exciting for you. Congratulations. This is a big deal.

Jamie Stephens: 49:48

I just want to say a big thank you to Kerry Wilson. I mean, wasn't she the best? I feel like I could just sit and chat with her for hours. Some of the key takeaways from this conversation are number one list into your body. Trust your gut and your intuition number two, it takes a village. Number three, don't be afraid to redefine what success looks like. Number four, stay out of the comparison game unless you're comparing versions of yourself. Number five, it's okay to say no. And number six, get yourself a circle to lean on and bounce ideas off of. If you want to learn more about Carrie you can follow her on Instagram and Facebook at green bird design. Thank you so much for listening. If you enjoyed this episode, please share with a friend. Make sure you're subscribed to receive new episodes and consider leaving a review on iTunes. Your support goes a long way in helping like minded folks find this show